What I know so far…

  1. Never put a fish bowl on a book shelf.

  2. No matter how much technology advances, the best toys will still be a stick, rocks and water.

  3. There is no such thing as “the family” pet.

  4. With thousands of dollars spent on toys, their favorite thing to play with will be the box it comes in.

  5. Time outs were invented to keep children safe and mothers sane.  Can I get a “mmmhhmm.”

  6. I haven’t had a “hot” meal in 8 years.

  7. My favorite times of day are nap time and bed time.

  8. Never trust a quiet 2 year old.

  9. I would have the time to “have it all” if it weren’t for those pesky hours I waste sleeping.

  10. My shit DOES stink!

  11. Everything in life is more fun while wearing a Cape.

  12. Your first child is always your “strong willed” one; until you have your second.


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